I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
