I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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