i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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