we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
We just shotgunned beers for America
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
that may or may not have been my penis.
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