Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
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