bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
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