how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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