make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Randomize
