carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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