I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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