Sry I called you an 8
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
