benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
