so explain again why im purple
no
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
COCAINE IS GR8
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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