im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
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Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
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I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Then you guys just all showered together...?
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