The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
