After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
