if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
