i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
