I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize