that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize