Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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