Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize