if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize
