is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I don't think brook has ever known best
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
