do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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