Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Randomize
