Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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