no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
