how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Randomize
