my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Let's get the cat blown out
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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