I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
