i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
