I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
Tell her she can't have a vagina
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
