I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I need to align my fucking chakras
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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