White coat. Heels.
Sry I called you an 8
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
