I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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