Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize
