i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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