We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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