I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
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