I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
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