hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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