Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
