Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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