So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize