wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
