He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
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