Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Randomize