i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
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what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
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The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
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