is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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